Bare Buns Fun Run

Pam: Opie dropped by my office this afternoon. He's getting ready to go to that clothing optional race he ran last year.

Ann: Did he really do that? I thought he was kidding!

Pam: Oh, he did it alright. It's called the “Bare Buns Fun Run”. He loved it.

Ann: I bet he did! He was joking with me that the only reason he was considering it was because he was sure he could knock several minutes off his best time if he wasn’t ‘weighted down’ by clothes.

Pam: I’m not sure he was joking. He’s a pretty serious runner. What I thought was funny is that they actually have race t-shirts. He wore it to my office today and it said, “Be Brave, Be Tough, Beat the Mountain in the Buff.”

Ann: That’s hysterical. What a visual! A bunch of naked people running up a mountain. It must be painful pinning those race numbers on, though.

Pam: Boy do we think alike. I asked Opie about it and he said they just slide a string through the paper and tie it around their waist. When I asked if they wear it in front or in back he said it depends on what you’re most proud of.

Ann: In that case, I’d need about a hundred of those paper numbers. So where’s this thing take place?

Pam: At a clothing optional resort up in the Pacific Northwest somewhere. I forget exactly where. I know he flew there.

Ann: I guess packing was pretty easy. You wouldn’t need much.

Pam: Just a lot of sunscreen. I asked Opie wasn’t it…how should I put this…physically uncomfortable to run without….support.

Ann: What’d he say?

Pam: He said it wasn’t bad for the men but that the women sometimes have a hard time. He said a number of the women ran with just sneakers and a sports bra.

Ann: Okay, now that’s just ridiculous. That would look sillier than running nude.

Pam: I thought so.

Ann: So how’d his theory of running faster without clothes work out for him?

Pam: He said he had a really good start and was doing very well for the first couple of miles. But then he came up behind a young attractive lady jogging in front of him. He said the sight was so nice he couldn’t stand the thought of passing her and giving up the inspiring view. So he just set a pace to stay right behind her…pardon the pun.

Ann: It gives a whole new meaning to the scenic Pacific Northwest. So after flying all the way up there he really didn’t get to test his theory. I guess that's why he's trying it again.

Pam: Like any good scientific investigation, it requires multiple data points. That's why he signed up at the finish line.