The Right Tool For The Job

Ann: I’m running out of time! Hannah and I head north to take her to school tomorrow. Of course she’s packing all her own stuff and the stuff for her dorm room. But I need to get myself packed for the trip.

Pam: That shouldn’t be too tough. The weather’s pretty predictable and it should be all casual right?

Ann: Yeah, but with everything I have left to tie up for work, I’m going to end up just throwing a big pile of clothes from the clean clothes basket into a carry-on and hoping it works out.

Pam: That’s the way I usually end up packing for pleasure trips. It goes fine until the last day or so when I end up having to wear a lime green top with lavender skirt and orange sandals. I figure, if the plane goes down on the way home, at least they’ll spot me in the wreckage right away.

Ann: Gee thanks...comforting thought! It’s not fair. It’s so easy for men to pack. For a casual event like this, all they have to do is throw in a bunch of khaki and navy shorts and a pile of polo shirts and they’re set. Everything matches everything. It’s like a whole suitcase of those kid’s clothes with the animals on the tags that tell them which ones match. Only the suitcase is full of clothes with the same animal on all the tags.

Pam: And the same animal in them! I point that out all the time to the men I travel with on business. They use the same color socks, belt, and shoes every single day. They can even wear the same jacket day after day and no one thinks a thing about it.

Ann: Yeah, a woman could never get away with that.

Pam: When they tease me about my bags, I explain that for every outfit I pack, I have to also pack the right undergarments, jewelry, hair accessories, shade of make up, belt, purse, shoes, scarf and jacket. It adds up pretty quickly.

Ann: I think it’s their hair that lets them get off easy. Woman pack shampoo, conditioner, a shower cap, hair spray, a wet comb, a hair brush, a styling brush, a curling iron or curlers, and sometimes both, hair bands, barrettes, elastics, and Scrunci’s of various colors. When we go to some hotels we even have to pack our own hair dryer. Men pack a comb. They use the tiny bottle of shampoo from the hotel. That’s it…a comb.

Pam: Oh but don’t they always point out the women with the thick, well groomed, beautiful hair? They want it both ways. They want us to look pulled-together and gorgeous, but we’re supposed to do it without the equipment.

Ann: And they’re the ones always down at the home improvement store justifying their latest purchase with ‘You gotta have the right tool for the job!’ Hypocrites!

Pam: I guess we’re supposed to just MacGyver it with our hair. Hang our head out the window of the rent car to dry it. Wrap it in those little bottles from the mini bar and sit in front of the heater to curl it.

Ann: Yeah and then we could use the rubber band off the newspaper to put it up and then slip the housekeeper a buck to get us some starch from the laundry to use for hair spray.

Pam: Finally, we could borrow the curtain tie backs to give us that final decorative touch.