Radio Days

Pam: I think I should just give in and buy myself a dunce cap. I did it again today.

Ann: Oh come on…you’re a smart lady. It can’t be that bad. What’d you do now?

Pam: Now? See what I mean! Not just “What’d you do?” but “What’d you do NOW!”

Ann: Sorry. I meant to say, “What’d you do on this, your ever so rare occasion of less than brilliance?”

Pam: That’s better! I was home working on my laptop and making an occasional phone call. I had the radio on next to me and kept fussing with the dial whenever the commercials came on.

Ann: ‘Dial’? Don’t you have pre-set stations like in the car?

Pam: No. It’s that old radio that was my grandfather’s. You’ve seen it. It has that cool big clear plastic dial that you actually turn to go up and down the…well, dial.

Ann: Yeah, I remember. I have to admit there’s something soothing and reminiscent about those old radios. Music…static, static, static….talk….static, static, static….music. It reminds me of my childhood.

Pam: Me too. That’s why I still use it. Anyway, I was sitting there and every fifteen or twenty minutes I would roll up or down the dial to find something new to listen to. That’s when I embarrassed myself…nearly publicly.

Ann: What happened?

Pam: At one point I stopped on a station to hear the end of one of my favorite songs. Then the DJ came on and announced “Be caller ten now to win”. The prize was tickets to a concert I’d love to go to.

Ann: You called?

Pam: I never do that kind of thing. Really. But I happened to have my phone in my hand as he announced the number to call and it was a concert I’d love to see. So on a whim I dialed.

Ann: Don’t tell me, you won the tickets!

Pam: I did! The DJ answers and says, “You’re caller number ten! What’s your name?” So I tell him my name and I sound all goofy and excited like everybody who wins tickets on the radio does.

Ann: I just can’t picture you squealing over a pair of tickets. So that’s how you made a fool of yourself, huh? That’s not so bad.

Pam: Oh no. I haven’t gotten to the me being a fool part yet. The DJ sounds so upbeat and thrilled for me. I finish saying how excited I am and who I will take to the concert and all that. Then the DJ asks in his happy, radio-man voice “So, Pam, tell us, what’s your favorite radio station?”

Ann: Did you enthusiastically give the name of the station?

Pam: I would have, except I had no idea what station I was listening to!

Ann: You didn’t?

Pam: No. Remember, I had been surfing up and down the dial and just stopped. I didn’t have a clue what station it was.

Ann: Wow. How embarrassing. What’d you do?

Pam: I stammered, and stuttered, and then, as enthusiastically as I could, said “This one!”

Ann: Not what he was looking for I take it?

Pam: He was pretty annoyed. Suddenly the happy, DJ voice went away and he says, “Cut! Damn it. Re-record….Pam, we’ve got to do it again.” He tells me the name of the station I’m talking to and says, “Could you write it down or something? And try to sound surprised and excited like we haven’t done this already.” Then back in his radio-man voice he says, “Hey there! You’re caller number ten. What’s your name?”

Ann: So the moral of the story is…if you call a radio station to win tickets, it’s a good idea to know which station you’re talking to.

Pam: That’s my suggestion!